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FROM SPARK TO FLAME

SINGERS of SPARK

1/8/2017

1 Comment

 
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BE YOURSELF, BE HAPPY!
​By Ryan Johnson

I used to care so much about what people thought. In fact, for most of my youth, my main focus was trying to fit in. I wanted to be liked and accepted. This is probably a familiar feeling for many people in their youth, if not throughout their lives. But for me it was important enough that I was willing to become a follower. I was willing to compromise values and priorities in order to be considered cool. I tried to put myself in groups of people that were popular and appeared to be exciting, fun, cool people. I wanted to be like that too.

I would say that I was successful. I had a group of friends that liked me, and I felt accepted. The confidence they had made me feel like I could follow them and that I would be happy in doing so. But I didn't feel confident or happy. I thought that I just needed to be a little more popular, attractive, hip, and edgy, THEN I would finally feel confident and happy. Why was it that after years of living this way that I wasn't happy? It wasn't until my early 20s that I started to discover the reason. I realized that I was living to please others. Everything I did was to gain approval in the eyes of other people.

It was around this time that I started to be myself. This wasn't easy. I had trained myself to think more about what others thought of me than what I thought of me. But gradually I began feeling more confident. I was content to go without the validation of others. I was able to enjoy my own natural qualities and quirks, and I was not disappointed in myself for my flaws. I learned that I can be me, and I can be happy.
1 Comment
Keith Lionel Brown link
2/2/2017 06:43:28 am

Ryan,

Thank you so much for your well written post and for the reminder that true happiness is found within ourselves and not through the validation of others. We achieve more in this life by being true to who we are than by following the voices of those who tell us who they think we are. Good job!

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